"I needed to let go of something HUGE, the thought that this man was their father and SHOULD BE acting like a loving parent, NOT hurting them, treating them like they didn't matter, using them to create chaos in my household...So I learned not to react when my son delivered the N-dad's bait.
"Smile at the bait. Willfully misunderstand its intent. Even pretend that it might be a good thing, turn it into something to smile about (quite a reach, often impossible but not always!)" ~forum member