Yea..finally figured out how to post...sooo grateful to find ya'll

[MsDeebster]

Well never to late to Illuminate...somehow born with joy and strength at 56 I'm hitting the wall. Fortune granted me a counselor that is helping ...Looks like I was born to a BPD Mom, I read about the "IN" Dad (mine definitely )...2 sisters in various states of character disorder ..Of course I ran away from home at 16, seeking to rescue broken men with the theme from Mighty Mouse in my head "here I come to save the day!!
It wasn't the BP men in my life, that made me hit the wall of pain with a thud (2 long term failures) Maybe because I think both of them had redeeming qualities (as if I would know) Its my abusive NPD  33 year old only daughter that has given birth to  Grandchildren, that she has blocked me from seeing..Ah yes she now has perfect control and the blackmail will never end....Talk about a spiderweb Charlotte!
Needless to say I walk around in a state of WTF???!! Quite in need of support...soo sorry that there are others suffering in this web ..... I will survive and maybe with some help ...thrive. Counselor says become a volunteer Grandma..thinking about that. Anyway Hello and love to you all!!

[CZBZ]

Hi MsDeebster!

Glad you were able to post a message...it can be rather daunting at first. If you have any problems using our forum, don't hesitate asking for help. 

Sounds like your counselor is offering solid support while you work through whatever problems you might be having. AND it sounds like she's helping you confront your internal Mighty Mouse, ha! I'll bet most people can relate to 'rescue' feelings being triggered whenever they felt sorry for someone. Narcissists do like to lap up the compassion and they aren't hesitant to pull out all the stops when it comes to garnering pity from people. What a surprise to find out they only TAKE compassion. They don't GIVE it.

What's happened with your daughter, MsDeebster? How old are those grandbabies you've been blocked from seeing? If you feel comfortable telling us a little bit more about your situation, we'd love to help if we can.

Hugs and welcome!

CZBZ

[honeybearII]

Welcome, Ms. Deebster!  So good to see you here and so glad you figured out the posting thing.  I'm 64 and only started using the computer about 6 years ago and today I actually downloaded a new Broadband wireless connection and I FEEL SO GOOD.  So many things I figured I could never do but have learned how to since leaving my exNH.  I felt so stupid all the time when I was with him because he used my typical human flaws to beat me over the head and beat me down.

Soon you will feel like there is NOTHING you can't tackle because you are smart, wise, and wonderful.

We all are!!!

Honey

[MsDeebster]

Wow ..already support thank you Honey and CZBZ..My Daughter has always been a powerhouse. My ex, her father always explained her as a triple Scorpio (astrologically) and he thought it cute.In my daughters world, (I now realize,) that I was never good enough, as she constantly criticized everything I said or did, it was like a deja vu (my BPD Mom). My Daughter married very well. Her husband agrees with every breath she takes and supports her in style. His mother groomed son in law in her business. Mother in Law is wealthy controls son and is very good at dealing with ND ..constantly buying stuff for her etc..It all looks very good.
Anyway,what happened is I didn't lie down for a degradation rampage actually what I said was "ok enough of your weird judgmental crap" She said I'm pulling the Grandchildren..I said F.U.(first time ever) Anyway  Grandson is 2 1/2 ..Grandaughter is 4 months I have not seen her ..My daughter had my little sister go to the birth (sister went) I will expound more on all this, this ...I dont know even what to call this ...I guess nightmare FOO and most painful ND scenario ... I have a long weekend fun distraction planned so I will be thankfully absorbed with hopefully healthy fun and I must focus on packing and getting out there. Just knowing you're there is awesome..thank you!!!

[MsDeebster]

Welcome, Ms. Deebster!  So good to see you here and so glad you figured out the posting thing.  I'm 64 and only started using the computer about 6 years ago and today I actually downloaded a new Broadband wireless connection and I FEEL SO GOOD.  So many things I figured I could never do but have learned how to since leaving my exNH.  I felt so stupid all the time when I was with him because he used my typical human flaws to beat me over the head and beat me down.

Soon you will feel like there is NOTHING you can't tackle because you are smart, wise, and wonderful.

We all are!!!

Honey

And very, very brave!!! Thanks honey!!

[Jacintae]

Hi Ms Deebster

Good to see you here. You are indeed in the right place. 

I see you feel you are quite in need maybe of a little support to survive and thrive life, and maybe family. I'm sorry about your not being able to see your little grandson and granddaughter.

But you have come to the right place here. I was in a huge mess of confusion and despair when I first came here but thanks to the wisdom and generosity of the wonderful wise warriors on here - my life is so much better and I am really moving on the thriving.

SO keep posting and telling your story. We are all here listening.


Lots of love

Jacintae xx

[stunned]

"But you have come to the right place here. I was in a huge mess of confusion and despair when I first came here but thanks to the wisdom and generosity of the wonderful wise warriors on here - my life is so much better and I am really moving on the thriving." Jacintae 

DITTO!  Welcome Ms Deebster.  There are many angels here.