newbie

[Rosemary]

Hi C.Z.., Ha Ha under the floor boards of a car !!!!! what next ????i had to laugh out loud at that one...
Well still NO contact with any of family ...this is very unusual behaviour for him .
Am going out to lunch today sunday ,but i cant eat so this will be interesting ,even sicked up some /toffee sweets last night .
We ought to have a thread on how its affected all  our, and the kids health on this site .I know its done a lot of damage to me ,as you try to keep alot of your emotions inside ,and this does the damage .
                      love rose x

[Rosemary]

having a bad day today feeling very down ....dont want to go out or meet anyone 
Im feeling lonely and sad damn it and damn him !!!!!
had a letter off solicitor to say whats what ect , but she has to get petition to me yet  to approve ,before she sends it to   him .She just wrote down the facts of the case for me to look at .alls ok but i just want her to send petition to the Basturd the sooner the better, im still angry as well as sad  am all seething inside .at the way hes made me feel if i was a man i would just punch him where it hurts im sooooo mad .Rose x

[Never again]

Hi Rosemary,

I just want to send you a  smile and a hug  .. Hmm, I can't seem to find a single hug, though I've seen them posted here all the time, but may a big fat cosy group hug  is even more what you need.

Hope you're feeling better today. Don't worry, that crumbum will get what he deserves one day.
Never again

[Rosemary]

Thankyou Never again ,
feeling better today got matrimonial  order papers for my approval ,have to add a few things and change some  mistakes they made at solicitors will take back by hand tmro .
They put the other womans addy down and he left her after 2 weeks .I rang where he used to live ,but it just rang and rang .....so i rang his mobile  and he answered ,so i told him i had tried to ring landline  ..he said oh its been cut off surprise !!!surprise!!!! so i told him " oh im ringing to tell you  youve got what you want im divorcing you
youve been such a prick !!! and i checked hes still at his old home address  think he was gobsmacked didnt say much ,but they dont feel anything so perhaps he was his usual dumb self ."thats all i have to say goodbye " i said .
I have been xmas shopping to cheer myself up feel sooo much better than yesterday .Im so up and down its unreal .Thankyou for the hug was appreciated i dont get any  =crying=Rose xxx

[CZBZ]

Dear Rosemary,

You know, this is one time in our lives when anger is a relief! When we're angry, we feel better---more powerful and certain. When we're sad, we feel vulnerable and that is so hard to cope with. Anger keeps us away from the crumbum and sadness makes us foolishly seek them out again...so be cautious when you are sad and don't reach out to the person who hurt you!

If it were easy to do that, we wouldn't need a place like WoN. The best way to help yourself really is to post when you are sad...cuz when you are pissed off, it's easy to get through a much-needed divorce. Gosh, do I know the difficulty of this! You just have to stick with the process and let the sad feelings come without reacting to them by giving in. I am sorry, truly sorry, for everything you are going through right now. It was the worst thing I've ever been through. 

I'll bet your soon-to-be-x expected you to be there for him...again. Expected you to just 'take' whatever he 'gave out'. Well, there comes a point when understanding loses to self-respect. He just cannot treat you like a back-up appliance, Rosemary. Good hot dang for you, for telling him so!!!  I hope he swallowed his tongue.

Hugs,
CZ

[Rosemary]

Thankyou C.Z. your  right about the being sad and posting here i was on here a lot yesterday reading up on things .
I hope he swallowed his tongue too .Im reading a book i got from the local library today called "all about ME loving a narcissist " by Simon crompton  hes a  health   and         relationship  author  not too bad but  a bit simplistic so far hes english, and i think the americans are way ahead in therapy  ,,we lag behind loads here .I dont think i could go and say any of this to my doctor or solicitor they would think IM mad not him .Its a shame really not to be  able to talk about it here in our country without the  people thinking your crazy .
But i have this wonderful lifesaving site  to natter on thank the lord for that.
                    love  rose x

[alatariel]

Well, Rosemary, many Dr's and therapists think we're the crazy ones here in the US, too, unless they are specialists in Cluster B disorders or have encountered these freaks themselves.  Just take one look at American tv to see the sort of N's we idolize and make rich-n-famous.. uh "Kim Kardashian"?  So with things like that broadcast as acceptable behavior, normals like us begin to look like the weird ones.  That, and N's have excellent facades, the ability to completely rewrite history in their favor and twist every single thing you say and do so that you wouldn't recognize it, and a great capacity for projection.

[Rosemary]

Yes Alatariel,American T.V. can be a bit wacky what ive seen of it i know what you mean .
The N and their projections and Lies are terrible ,never their fault is it .
I took my marriage file petition back to solicitors by hand today ,i didnt see her just her receptionist .
Havent heard anything from the BEAST since i told him he was a prick and im divorcing him.
Am going out tonight to my Pagan Moot with eldest son and my daughter we are making xmas insence for Yule and other craft work ,so i can forget things for a while .
went to docs this morning and got more meds !!! feeling ok today in a DO IT mood .
Did more xmas shopping too ,will be finished early i think at this rate .
                love rose x

[CZBZ]

 

You are moving! You are taking care of yourself! Finishing your Christmas shopping already!??!!! That is marvelous to read! I'm really impressed by how quickly you have taken stock of reality, accepted it, and move forward!


Hugs,
CZ

[Rosemary]

Thankyou C.Z .
had news of the NH yesterday  ,he rang our youngest son in Wales ,also tried to ring our daughter ,but she didnt answer it .

He txtd me  "I dont want an answer to this ,have got xmas prezzies for you all will post through door 2 weeks "

i answered " Its too late 4 presents i dont want anything from you " he said back "ok" ..........
Bazturd that he is ,thats what he was ringing the son about .Its also all of our bdays mine my youngest son and daughter all in december ....I think hes just realised hes not been counted in this year ,and after losing the" gingerbread girl "hes a bit lost oh diddums !!!! Merry xmas !! he had got his social money Tuesday and would have been drinking and reminicing 

[CZBZ]

Astounding that he expects to weezle his way back into his family's hearts with Christmas presents!!! As if all it takes is a wrapped gift and everything is a-ok again. Reminds you of a six-year-old, doesn't it? People are always saying narcissists are like little kids---problem is: they aren't. They are adults with all the responsibilities that go along with that.

Don't you go feeling sorry for him, though. If everyone in the family is fed up with his antics, it might be easy for you to pity him. Be careful with that....it's how a lot of us got stuck going back to them for round two, or three or one hundred!

(He'd better get back in Internet chat rooms as fast as he can or he'll be spending Christmas alone!) 

Hugs,
CZ

[Rosemary]

Thanks C.Z. no im not feeling sorry for him at all and i wont be going back either,Ive done that before and know what happens so im very wary of the beasty N.....Bazturd he can stew in his own mess hes created it ,he will have to get out of it ,not my business anymore .

Have got my xmas led fairy lights today for the tree and the lovely booze that hes NOT sharing this year .
I askedmy daughter if she would like to have a big New Year party at my house as she only has a1 bed flat ,but she says she may just stay in .
I wanted to have a party for me and the kids ,as hes always been very morose on New Years Eve .His father was Scots and it reminds him of his dad who died a few years ago .So i just thought it would be a cheery one this year without the BAzturd N.we shall see anyway im goin to celebrate myself if noone else is as hope to get my divorce next year so i  have something very big on my resolutions list NO 1 =divorce